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So you came here expecting serious treatment of major brow-beetling issues: finance, politics, economics, the rise and fall of nations. Forget it. I want to discuss, well, dogs. This is a subject I admit I know very little about. In fact, what I know about dogs I've mostly learned by petting them and intermittently watching the Westminster Dog Show over the years, while flipping around to see what else was on. I've learned that some dogs can play with children and some dogs are better left chained up in the north 40 and fed from a helicopter. Scotties are way too smart and Great Danes are way too big, particularly if its handler is way too short. Many breeds seem profoundly neurotic, and others yap, but I may be over-interpreting the sanitized commentary. Some dogs have giant bobble heads on go-cart bodies; some dogs seem to spend more time at the groomer than Joan Rivers. Dogs seem to be judged, like people, by what distant relatives did for a living: sheepherders, ratters, hunters, accountants. Some dogs, I hate to say, seem more comfortable in teacups; others resemble courtesans or gigolos. There is much I do not know, perhaps because I had switched to the Knicks game watching Jeremy Lin do his thing. Like what's that business of flipping ears and hair over the dog's eyes? And what's the handler doing to those tails while the judge does a dental exam? It's mildly embarrassing. I don't blame Mary Carillo for not going there. This is a long way from tennis. 
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